Useless

Eastern Box Turtles are fascinating reptiles.  Unless you know what you're looking for, they are very difficult to spot on the floor of a forest.  Called a box turtle because it can pull in its head and close the front portion of the plastron to protect itself this amazing turtle is a perfect example of intelligent design by our incredible Creator.  Eating berries and plants, grubs, worms, and bugs, this beautifully decorated turtle thrives in its natural habitat.

Thinking this morning upon my morning portion of God's word I realized that all too often I was like this shy turtle, pulling in my head and closing the door, hiding behind my shell of protection.  In fact, often I am useless to the Lord!  That hurts.  Involved in a rescue mission ministry I need to be fully available to the Lord Jesus and the Holy Spirit to touch the lives of those in need.  I can't be useless!

In my journal I asked the question:  What makes me useless?  Any time that I am not serving the Lord with my whole heart I become useless.  You probably never have difficulty with this, but I often want people to approve of me, and to recognize the work that I've done, to hear accolades from others.  Unfortunately, when I have this attitude I'm serving myself, and like the Pharisee of Jesus' example, I'm going to receive my full reward.  But it won't be the reward He wants to give me!  So I added another question:  What makes me useful?

This is probably another area you don't struggle with, but I often have difficulty being absolutely honest with myself in my journal.  I don't like reading about my real faults and shortcomings.  So this morning I determined that I would be brutally honest in answering both of those questions.  It hurt.

When I give myself wholly to Jesus in service He gets the glory.  Should I live in such a way that my service to other people gives them a clear view of what Jesus is like, and draws them to Him, I'm getting it right.  Even more difficult is the concept that serving the Lord Jesus this way is not done for reward.  Service itself is our reward!

Knowing that one day I will stand before Him and look into those eyes filled with love and devotion, fills me with anticipation and fear.  Seeing Him has got to be the most awesome moment of my life!  I know He loves me, and that I'm forgiven.  But what if Jesus puts his arms around my shoulder and says, "Bill, Bill, Bill!  Let Me show you what you could have accomplished if only you'd trusted Me more!"  Certainly, like you, I would prefer "Well done good and faithful servant."  Honesty.

Do I really want people to know Jesus?  Is the gospel of Jesus Christ, the testimony of God, and the resurrection my soul focus when I talk to people?  All to often my focus is me!  Any time my eyes wander from my Lord I become useless.  Today I want people to see Jesus so clearly in me that they are drawn to Him through my service.  Please, Jesus, help me!